Showing posts with label Jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jokes. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

running

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"When I was in the desert," said Nasruddin one day, "I caused an entire tribe of horrible and bloodthirsty bedouins to run."


"However did you do it?" asked a person.


"Easy. I just ran, and they ran after me."


From islamcam.com

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strong Iman

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An elderly lady was well-known for her Iman and for her confidence in talking about it. She would stand in front of her house and say Alhamdulilah "Allah be praised" to all those who passed by. Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout, "There ain't no Lord!!" Hard times came upon the elderly lady, and she prayed for Allah to send her some assistance. She would pray out loud in her night prayer" Oh Allah! I need food!! I am having a hard time, please Lord, PLEASE LORD, SEND ME SOME GROCERIES!!" The atheist happened to hear her as she was praying, and decided to play a prank on her. The next morning the lady went out on her porch and noted a large bag of groceries and shouted, "Alhamdulilah, Allah be praised!." The neighbor jumped from behind a bush and said, "Aha! I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries, God didn't." The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and said, "ALHAMDULILAH WA SHUKRILLAH”. He not only sent me groceries, but he made the devil pay for them!"

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Patience

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Once, the people of the city invited Mulla Nasruddin to deliver a speech. When he got on the minbar (pulpit), he found the audience was not very enthusiastic, so he asked "Do you know what I am going to say?" The audience replied "NO", so he announced "I have no desire to speak to people who don't even know what I will be talking about" and he left. The people felt embarrassed and called him back again the next day. This time when he asked the same question, the people replied "YES" So Mullah Nasruddin said, "Well, since you already know what I am going to say, I won't waste any more of your time" and he left. Now the people were really perplexed. They decided to try one more time and once again invited the Mullah to speak the following week. Once again he asked the same question - "Do you know what I am going to say?" Now the people were prepared and so half of them answered "YES" while the other half replied "NO". So Mullah Nasruddin said "The half who know what I am going to say, tell it to the other half" and he left!

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Sunday, August 14, 2016

Islam and Americans

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A man is taking a walk in Central park in New York. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull dog . He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He succeeds in killing the dog and saving the girl's life. A policeman who was watching the scene walks over and says: "You are a hero, tomorrow you can read it in all the newspapers: "Brave New Yorker saves the life of little girl" The man says: -"But I am not a New Yorker!" "Oh ,then it will say in newspapers in the morning: 'Brave American saves life of little girl'" – the policeman answers."But I am not an American!"– says the man. "Oh, whatare you then? " The man say in newspapers in the morning: 'Brave American saves life of little girl'" – the policeman answers."But I am not an American!"– says the man. "Oh, what are you then? " The man says: - "I am a Saudi !" The next day the newspapers says: "Islamic extremist kills innocent American dog.

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It is in your pockets

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Here is the story of an Imam who got up after Friday prayers and announced to the people:"I have good news and bad news. The good news is, wehave enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets.

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